Can 'I Love You' Be Too Soon?

We live in a society that, for the most part, is run by religious institutions. These institutions tell you how to live, how to talk, how to live your life, what to do and what not to do. But none of these religious doctrines’ tell you how long it is acceptable to wait before saying 'I love you' to your partner.

So...

Can saying 'I love you' ever be said too soon?

Looking at text ranging from the Harlem Renaissance even as far back as the Biblical stories told, there is nothing that tells us how long to wait before love is acceptable to be voiced. William Shakespeare had all of his main leads quickly fall in love. Even characters from the Bible have no regards for length of time for love. The moment Jonathan saw David, he loved him and made sure David had everything. Even a chest to cry on before they split up because of the envious father. Jacob hadn't seen Rachel for all but ten minutes before he loved her and was willing to work 7 years and 1 week before he married Rachel, and then was willing to work 7 more years after he married Rachel. Samson hadn't known Delilah for a day and loved her, not knowing she was after much more and he ended up committing suicide after.

Even after all of these stories are told, we still are left with that nagging question: Is it okay to say those 3 words even if time hasn't lapsed? In the gay community, it is frowned upon. You will hear things like 'That's not love, its lust' or 'How can you love someone you barely know?' All good points, but all are also very cynical. Love is blind. You also hear this saying, too, especially from the same cynical people. If love is compared to the person it is modeled after, it would mean that love has no respect of physical condition, skin color or anything else that one sees with one’s eyes. So, shouldn't time be considered in this as well since, after all, blindness cannot see time?

Then, if this is true, why are we putting time limits on our inner most feelings? Is it to protect your inner most self? Is it to determine if the partner is worthy of such love? Whatever the reason, just let it go. Let it breathe, and let it flourish. Love is a beautiful thing that, like grass, grows at an incredible fast speed. Loving someone should not have any time limits attached. Because we are all created in love and that love is meant to be shared, displayed and recharged.

Therefore, saying I love you can never be said too soon. But be wise, not everyone is open to love as most people are. But never give up on love, never give up on voicing your love and never stop loving who you are.
 Chazak, chazak, v'nitchazek - Be strong, be strong, and may you have strength!

National Coming Out Day

NCOD was founded in 1988 by Robert Eichberg, a psychologist from New Mexico and founder of the personal growth workshop, The Experience, and Jean O'Leary, an openly-gay political leader from Los Angeles and then head of the National Gay Rights Advocates. The date of October 11 was chosen because it was the anniversary of the 1987 National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights.

Now that you have the quick two second history lesson, let us begin class. I honor every gay right, civil awareness day that G-d can create. It gives the misinformed a chance to educate themselves on things they don't know anything about. And sometimes, it works. But what is disheartening is that, majority of the gay community doesn't even know about gay history. Or think it is beneath them to know such history.

Get off Adam4Adam. Get off BGCLive. Get off ManHunt. Get off all the hookup sites that you claim are 'social networking sites'. That's what Facebook, MySpace and Twitter are for. Anyone who says hookup sites are anything but, are lying to themselves and others. Being gay means more than just going to the club every Friday and Saturday. Being gay means more than going to Black Gay Pride events to show off your body you have been working on everyday prior in hopes of giving laid.

Being gay means more.

People, gay and straight alike, have fought and died for the rights of homosexuals to become equal to their heterosexual counterparts. We have fought hard to repeal DADT. We have risked our lives to strip DOMA of its horrific standpoints. People have fought hard to bring HIV Awareness to kids today. And living a lie, living on the 'down low', living with a view of only being in a relationship just to have a steady sex fest, trivializes the death, memory and history of the LGBT community. No one says you have to back Gay Marriage but there is a distinct difference from saying 'I don't want to get married to someone of the same sex' and saying 'I think gay marriage is wrong.' If you don't want to elevate your relationship to domestic partnership/marriage, then don't. But don't think that everyone should share in your ignorant views.

So on this day, put aside your differences and just love yourself for who G-d made you to be. A big, ole homosexual. But just know that it is only up to YOU to add 'happy' to that description. Ken yehi ratzon: May it be G-d's will.