So I went to this "straight" night club (right across the street from the Tribune Building) with my gentleman caller and OMG do I have a review for you!
The reason we went was to support his friend who was performing. The moment I stepped in the building I knew that I wasn't the only homosexual standing. So, I went to the bathroom to release my bladder and I had to use a urinal (ugh). Come to find out, it didn't work. Typical, seeing how the bathroom was far from immaculate. Well, I went back to my guest and met his friend who was performing (I felt a hint of DL from his hand shake, not my type though.) and started to order a drink from the bar. The drink I always and only get is a 'White Russian' and when the female bartender looked at me and said 'How do you make that?' I sat there thinking, 'Your kidding?'
Of course, leave it to black folks (gay or straight) to HARDLY ever start on time. The show was supposed to start at 9 and after my drink and taking in my surroundings to talk about here, it didn't jump off till, oh, 10:09pm. The band was great and I could listen to them all night, but the MC's were a bit overly obnoxious. The first act was a poet and he was fairly decent. Aside from the drunken chatter from behind me, I heard the meaning of the poems he did. It got a half of an applause from me. Immediatly following was two guys rapping. Reppin' da West Coast, they hyped up (or tried to hype up) the place. I began to notice that one of the rappers looked dead on Tony, my first love. Short and stocky, with his fitted hat and white tee. Everything. I sighed and shook my head in dispair. Needless to say, it got no applause from me.
So this girl gets up after and when I tell you Simon Calwell would have lit into her, take a hint. She was off key through 89% of the song, did not move from the stance she was in, thought she was singing good cause she kept getting loud, and when you thought it was over, she did another song. She stood in the same position and sounded like Keisha Cole and Ashanti, both suffering with a cold. To make it worse, she was the vocal director of the place. My guest leans over and says, "Her friends are saying she is drunk, thats why she sounds like that." I thought, "THATS her excuse?" After that 'hated it' performance, it was another female singer who used the band instead of background music like all the others did. She was good. But I guess anything is better than what I just went through. She worked the room and she hit them keys right. She got a smile from me after.
Cue another rapper to perform, and he actually got the place hype. People on the dance floor going 'dumb' and his lyrics weren't all that bad. Until his song, 'From the Ghetto.' He went from 'Bitch WORK' to 'No boo boo'. After him, they announced this "well known, famous, professional" singer on the stage, who OBVIOUSLY is a complete and utter homosexual (vers bottom if I may be blunt). But baby, he was JOOD! I actually sang along with him. I was really impressed and remind me to hunt for him on Myspace. Finally was the reason we came, my gentleman caller's friends. They were a dance group and did a series of dance steps to a mix tape they apparently made. But all in all, they were good. In sync with each other, moving and groving like they were on 'So You Think You Can Dance' or whatever show it is. I enjoyed.
So to sum up my experience, the performances were far from heaven but no where near hell. And if I ever need to get laid, the 'straight' night club is where I will be.
Till next time....love yourself and each other. LOL.
The reason we went was to support his friend who was performing. The moment I stepped in the building I knew that I wasn't the only homosexual standing. So, I went to the bathroom to release my bladder and I had to use a urinal (ugh). Come to find out, it didn't work. Typical, seeing how the bathroom was far from immaculate. Well, I went back to my guest and met his friend who was performing (I felt a hint of DL from his hand shake, not my type though.) and started to order a drink from the bar. The drink I always and only get is a 'White Russian' and when the female bartender looked at me and said 'How do you make that?' I sat there thinking, 'Your kidding?'
Of course, leave it to black folks (gay or straight) to HARDLY ever start on time. The show was supposed to start at 9 and after my drink and taking in my surroundings to talk about here, it didn't jump off till, oh, 10:09pm. The band was great and I could listen to them all night, but the MC's were a bit overly obnoxious. The first act was a poet and he was fairly decent. Aside from the drunken chatter from behind me, I heard the meaning of the poems he did. It got a half of an applause from me. Immediatly following was two guys rapping. Reppin' da West Coast, they hyped up (or tried to hype up) the place. I began to notice that one of the rappers looked dead on Tony, my first love. Short and stocky, with his fitted hat and white tee. Everything. I sighed and shook my head in dispair. Needless to say, it got no applause from me.
So this girl gets up after and when I tell you Simon Calwell would have lit into her, take a hint. She was off key through 89% of the song, did not move from the stance she was in, thought she was singing good cause she kept getting loud, and when you thought it was over, she did another song. She stood in the same position and sounded like Keisha Cole and Ashanti, both suffering with a cold. To make it worse, she was the vocal director of the place. My guest leans over and says, "Her friends are saying she is drunk, thats why she sounds like that." I thought, "THATS her excuse?" After that 'hated it' performance, it was another female singer who used the band instead of background music like all the others did. She was good. But I guess anything is better than what I just went through. She worked the room and she hit them keys right. She got a smile from me after.
Cue another rapper to perform, and he actually got the place hype. People on the dance floor going 'dumb' and his lyrics weren't all that bad. Until his song, 'From the Ghetto.' He went from 'Bitch WORK' to 'No boo boo'. After him, they announced this "well known, famous, professional" singer on the stage, who OBVIOUSLY is a complete and utter homosexual (vers bottom if I may be blunt). But baby, he was JOOD! I actually sang along with him. I was really impressed and remind me to hunt for him on Myspace. Finally was the reason we came, my gentleman caller's friends. They were a dance group and did a series of dance steps to a mix tape they apparently made. But all in all, they were good. In sync with each other, moving and groving like they were on 'So You Think You Can Dance' or whatever show it is. I enjoyed.
So to sum up my experience, the performances were far from heaven but no where near hell. And if I ever need to get laid, the 'straight' night club is where I will be.
Till next time....love yourself and each other. LOL.
No comments:
Post a Comment